Broken Man

There was a soft smirk on my lips as I rolled the bottle between my fingers, the tiny pellets inside the transparent plastic tube falling over one another as I stared at them, my eyes narrowing as I drank in the sight of the vibrant red against the dull white. Snapping the cap, I pulled out just one, my heart beating faster than before as I raised it into line with my eyes, staring at the crimson capsule that held hundreds of miniscule spheres. Calmly, I put it onto my tongue, and waited as the capsule dissolved in my saliva.

Bliss;

That was the only word I could use to describe the feeling that thundered through my veins like a tsunami. Faintly, I could still feel the slightly disgruntling sensation of those tiny spheres slipping down my throat, but the pleasure was overwhelming as I gasped weakly, my fingernails biting viciously into the arm-rests of the leather couch.

I could feel my hands rip the leather between my fingers as I arched, white dancing behind my closed eye-lids as the very same pleasure danced through my blood, setting my entire body on fire as I moaned softly.

Slowly, the bliss receded, and I was filled with a hollow-ness as the faux-pleasure was drained from my system. Every cell in my body seemed to scream simultaneously as I leaned back weakly, panting as cold sweat rained down my forehead. The acidic liquid drenched my hair, forcing the creamy chocolate-coloured strands to darken to a dirt colour as I lifted my head pathetically.

Shifting my gaze from the blank ceiling, I looked down at the carpeted floor, barely making out the scarlet pellets that had fallen between the dark strands of fabric. “Beautiful,” I murmured weakly as I brushed a hand across my forehead, pushing aside the short, spiky locks of hair that had fallen into my eyes.

I sagged against the leather pathetically as the hollowness grew into pain, feeding off the remains of the pleasure that had once raced through my veins. The pain seemed to grow, without needing a source of sustenance as I curled weakly, tears pricking my eyes as I attempted to shield myself from the pain by enveloping my vision with darkness.

“Go away!” I screamed out as I grabbed myself, sobs wracking through me as I tried to ward the pain away. The sobs eventually died to whimpers, which eventually turned into whines.

The inky blackness that had surrounded my vision slowly turned to grey, the darkness lightening until all I could see was the light.

Agony;

The only sensation that ran through me was agony as I lolled on the couch, choking on my own saliva as I wished my life away. “Please,” I cried, my tears melting into the dribbles of perspiration that ran down my face as I arched, my spine curling before I finally dropped. The hollowness was welcome now, I mused as I threw the bottle aside; a hiss flying from my lips as I opened my eyes weakly before a soft smile grazed my lips.

Finally nothing …

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